*Sometimes you just can’t fix yourself. Right Sunny? (@funnysunnynyc*)

Clients often come to me after they’ve heard “You’ll go farther faster if you only:

Get rid of that annoying vocal habit (uptalk, monotone, gravelly voice, etc.)
OR
Try to look and sound more like a leader (nonspecific)”

And their well-meaning mentor, leadership coach, or colleague follows up with: “Now that you’re aware, fix it. ASAP.”

Which makes the person who needs “fixing” try to “fix” themselves. Usually they can’t. And of course they get frustrated.

That’s when I get the call.

Not everyone is the same, and not all solutions look alike. So I start off sharing general strategies and tools for speaking best practices. And then we dig into the specifics.

It takes time to refine or redefine your speaking technique. And you need to embrace a new mental attitude toward what your body is doing—what is actually happening to your “instrument”—when you engage in the physical act of public speaking.

Understanding you have a problem is the first step to solving it. But it’s not enough.

So please, tell those advice-givers that you need to find someone who can help you fix whatever they have said you need to improve upon. You’d find a coach to help you with your batting stance or golf swing, right? Or a music teacher to get your bowing right or help correct your pitch?

You need an expert to guide you. It’s a process.

And be patient with yourself: it takes a while to replace bad habits with a new way of speaking. But once you learn how it’s done, you’ll have this skill for life!